Facing the Pain

Ever feel something so painful that you're too afraid to feel it, because then whatever is hurting you becomes real, and when it becomes real you just know the pain is unbearable?  That's the kind of pain that comes with loss.  Loss of a spouse, a family member, a friend, or God forbid a child.  There is no pain greater than loss either through death or otherwise.  The end of a relationship is a death to your heart and thus a grieving process; it's important to not rush through the process.  So when you're ready take a deep breath and slowly guide yourself to your where you need to be.

• If you have been holding in the pain for a while it may take some time to bring it up.  You might need some help, like playing music, talking it out, or writing in a journal may help you to bring it to the surface.  
• When you start to feel it rising pay attention to your thoughts.   Your brain's job is to protect you, it will do this by keeping you from feeling, so you end up just thinking instead feeling.  Therefore you need to push thoughts aside and allow yourself to feel.  The more times you do the easier it will become. 
• It takes more than one cry.  It may take 3 or 300, regardless, each time you allow yourself to feel it then you are that much closer to letting it go.  
• Close the wound when it's time to move on.  There is a time and place for everything, if you leave the wound open your setting yourself up to be hurt again.  
• You need something else to take its place.  The pain has been taking up space, and once you start removing it then there needs to be something else to replace it, like acceptance and love through a new friendship 

Pain doesn't seem like a good thing but it is.  Pain means healing, allow yourself to feel so that you can heal. Take the time for yourself like you would be for any of your friends.  How many times have you sat on the phone for hours on end just listening, do the same for yourself?  

"The journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step." Lao-Tzu

 A well-planned out detox session ensures a constructive home spa experience.

For optimum health your body requires a balanced diet, an abundance of H2O and uninterrupted sleep.  

Ideally, regularly choosing fresh whole foods; foods that are closer to their “natural state” are more beneficial.  They include but are not limited to all fish, lean meats and low-fat dairy products.  

 Unsaturated fats are the good fat.  Eat plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables and keep processed sugar products to a minimum.  Limit your intake of caffeine and alcohol.  

Minor dehydration affects all aspects of our well-being; mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual self.  Water flushes toxins from our system thus abetting absorption and transportation of nutrients.  

Choosing bottled water means choosing a “non-sparkling spring water with a low mineral and sodium content” or better yet use filtered water.  Eight glasses of filtered water a day to keep the toxins at bay.  

When detoxing, aim to increase your water intake.  

A glass first thing in the morning and last thing before bed, always have water readily available and eat foods with high water content like celery and lettuce.  When you sleep your body is working hard to flush out toxins in your body, that`s why the bathroom is your first stop when you wake up.  Sleep is a time of renewal and regeneration, therefore following a routine sleep schedule will help keep your body running smoothly.

“When you sleep, your body rests and restores its energy levels. However, sleep is an active state that affects both your physical and mental well-being. A good night's sleep is often the best way to help you cope with stress, solve problems, or recover from illness.” (www.webmd.com)

Life Coach

What is a Life Coach?

A life coach is a person you pay to keep you on track.  Think of her/him as a personal trainer for your life.  She helps you to define your goals more clearly, she helps you to be realistic and accountable in completing them, and sometimes kicks your butt when you need it.  You can think of him as a mapper, he will help you to map out your goals based on your needs and supports your process as you move towards a happier, healthier life.

Who needs one?

If your motivated but just not sure what steps to take next then a coach would he helpful. If you have areas of your life that are doing great and other areas are not so great then a coach will help you to find that balance.  If you know where you want to go but don't know all the steps or unsure of your resources then a coach could be for you.

What to look for in a Life Coach.

A life coach needs to be a great listener and visionary.  He needs to be able see what you see when you picture the direction of your life.  The only way he can do that is to listen, it is through you he will be able to see.  A Life Coach doesn't appease you.  He doesn't judge you.  You need to determine your needs first, prior deciding.  Ask yourself what kind of person will you respect even if they disagree with you.

You need to be honest about yourself during this process, do you conform or rebel when your backed into a corner.  Picking the right coach is the difference between a positive or negative life changing experience.  So pick wisely.

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Top Ten Rated Films by Psychologists

According to Find a Psychologist.org these are the top ten self-help movies.

Psychologists' Top-Rated Self-Help Films

1. Temple Grandin (autism & Asperger’s)

2. Iris (dementia/Alzheimer’s)

3. Milk (gay, lesbian, bisexual issues)

4. Ordinary People (suicide/death & grieving) 

5. I Never Sang for My Father (men’s issues)

6. On Golden Pond (aging) 

7. Billy Elliot (men’s issues) 

8. Away from Her (dementia/Alzheimer’s) 

9. The Joy Luck Club (families & stepfamilies) 

10. The Squid and the Whale (divorce)

Self Help from SelfGrowth.com- -SelfGrowth.com is the most complete guide to information about Self Help on the Internet.